This year has been one out of the box for most of the world, and continues to disrupt in a way we’ve never seen before. It’s been a great lesson in dealing with uncertainty as the on off nature of life continues. We talk about returning to normal, or a new normal but what is normal anyway and is this really new? We’ve not had Covid-19 before but we have had earthquakes tsunamis, terrorism and other global events that have disrupted our lives and wrecked our economy.
To me this is just another event we navigate in the uncertainty of life and this is not new but it is normal.
There’s so much about life we can’t control but we like to think we do. My making plans, having goals and living inside our rituals we appear to have it all planned out – until we don’t. Until we lose our job, have to cancel our wedding, run out of business or get sick.
I’m reflecting on this as I hear one of the biggest conferences I’ve ever spoken at in terms of line up and celebrity notoriety is cancelled – I wonder when I’ll next be speaking at a conference, particularly outside of NZ. I’m due to get married this month but that’s been on and off as we fluctuate between lockdown levels. A few weeks ago it became apparent none of the international guests could make it – that’s my entire family. Obviously I’d never thought I’d get married without them there.
The border restrictions and difficulty travelling has made family feel very far away. As someone who’s lived here for a decade now I’ve been back to see my family every year for those ten. I’ve always taken it for granted that if anything was to happen I could hop on a plane and be there in 24 hours. At the moment it’s not that simple and comes with the risk of getting Covid-19 or not being able to get back home.
I’ve also, perhaps not coincidentally noticed a drop in my productivity. My mood has dipped, I’m not as motivated and probably in need of a rest. Reflecting on the uncertainty Covid-19 has brought to us all its hardly surprising. We’ve been on an emotional rollercoaster with the uncertain nature of our life, business and the loss of some of that too – for some even the loss of life. This takes it’s toll and even for those of us that are thriving, this year has been harder than most.
As high achievers we can be hard on ourselves, we’re used to performing at our peak. Any drops in that or less than brilliant performances we put in tend to bring inner criticism, guilt or that sense of not measuring up. We’re driven by achievement and to always be at our best. It’s why times like this can be tough, we expect to be on our A game all the time and sometimes, especially these times, we simply are not. And that’s ok. Just because we’re capable of brilliance doesn’t mean we should expect it all the time. We have to roll with the peaks and troughs and know that at times like this we may see a drop in our motivation and productivity and that’s ok.
Given all that’s gone on and the general covid fatigue that’s around I’d say it’s to be expected. What this is generally a sign of for high achievers is the need to take rest, down time, recovery, a pause so that we can regroup and continue to perform in line with our expectations. Let’s not beat ourselves up during these pauses, they are critical for us to stay at our best – I say this as much as a reminder for myself as anyone else!
So life is uncertain and for most of us not really going to plan right now but such is the nature of a human life and the world we live in. It’s why it’s even more important we make the best of what we have, to reflect on what we might take for granted and be grateful for all we have. Even if that comes with sacrifices.
We also need to be mindful of the toll this takes on our energy, mood and motivation. Whilst it might seem like we’re coping and getting on with it because, well what choice do we have, the underlying subconscious will have been on an emotional rollercoaster so we’ll likely feel fatigued, a little less tolerant than normal and perhaps not as productive. Be kind, especially to yourself and know that this is normal, take rest and some time to recover.
I’m so lucky to live in NZ and wouldn’t want to be anywhere else right now, I’m lucky I’m not sick and nor is anyone I know and love. I’m grateful I’m in a loving relationship and can get married, for the technology that’ll beam in my overseas family and the fact that my business, whilst it’s changed during Covid times remains viable and makes an impact. I feel pretty lucky that I get to do what I love everyday in a country I love surrounded by people I love.
These challenges remind us to focus on what we can control and to see the sunshine amongst the clouds and that our world by it’s very nature is change, disruption and uncertainty.
It’s not a case of trying to change the stuff we can’t control but changing ourselves so we can adapt to the challenges that arise.
To know that we never really know what’s around the corner and therefore uncertainty is our normal. So rather than trying to make life certain we need to learn to make peace with uncertainty.