We keep banging on about our new normal but is it really that normal?

Many of us are struggling right now and to be honest, that is normal in these circumstances.

Whether it’s being apart from loved ones over lockdown, illness, fear, the struggle with kids, home schooling, job security worries or the prospect of getting covid – there’s a lot to feel upset about right now.

Add to that personal circumstances of missing big family events like births and deaths, unable to grieve as we usually do, gain closure or visit loved ones in hospital. Losing your business overnight and wondering how you’ll pay the bills. Getting a covid positive result and realising you’ve passed it to your family. Losing all your usual mental health support whether that be in the form of people, places, activities or freedoms. Every bit of this current climate is a test on our already stretched mental health.

I’m the most optimistic, hopeful person most people know and yet I’m not ok with this. I think that’s normal.

Even in usual times most of us are limping to the finish line of the end of the year, tired, worn out and ready for a break. Looking forward to a clean slate and a new start. In fact this time last year weren’t we all saying thank god 2020 is over let’s hope for a better 2021. It looks like rinse and repeat on that score again this year.

Our usual end of year burnout comes with a covid exacerbation this year. Everything that’s normally hard just got a whole lot harder and even more so this year because we’d already had a tough year previously. We started this year on empty so that’s why right now everything feels so hard.

Been shut in a room without an opening window for 2 weeks give you a lot of time to reflect and yet it’s a process anyone who wants to see overseas family right now must go through (and many more who can’t even access said inhumane process).

But what choice do we have? This is to protect the health of the nation right? Then begs the questions which health comes first physical or mental and what will the far reaching consequences of this pandemic and our response be? We’ll save lives but we’ll also lose some, we’ll lose part of ourselves that won’t be diagnosable or grieved like a covid death and we’ll lose freedoms and opportunities we’ve taken for granted all of our lives.

Nothing about our current climate is normal so if you don’t feel ok about it, that’s ok, in fact that’s probably the most normal part of this whole situation.

I don’t pretend to have the answer but I did want to bring the reality out into the open and tell you if you’re struggling right now, you’re not alone. This is testing for the most resilient people I know so let’s acknowledge that and share the honest truth.

My top tips:

· Surround yourself with those who lift you up and support you (even virtually)

· Reach out and ask for help when you need it

· Move – get out in nature, stretch, get your heart rate up however you can

· Nourish yourself from the inside out with what you eat and drink

· Breathe – close your eyes and take 3 deep belly breaths

· Think of 3 things you’re grateful for everyday

· Listen to your favourite music (or create it)

· Spend less time scrolling and more time checking in with your feelings

Where to go for support

Anxiety Helpline 0800 269 4389

Free call or text any time for support from a trained counsellor 1737