I really enjoyed watching Jacinda Arderns chat about self-care with Sir John Kirwan especially given that at 4 minutes they touch on Imposter Syndrome. I love it when celebrities talk openly about this kind of vulnerability because it normalises it for everyone else. We know Imposter Syndrome is the domain of high achievers but those who experience it still see it as some fatal character flaw and a weakness. When people as successful as this admit to it, we all get some hope and optimism!
John Kirwan talks about his try in the world cup and thinking when he came off that it was just luck and he was on the verge of being dropped. Jacinda Ardern has long talked openly about her Imposter Syndrome and in this interview admits to not feeling it as much these days.
Imposter Syndrome is something I’ve spent the last few years writing about, delivering coaching and workshops on and seeing the potential people reach when they learn to overcome it not to mention the reduction in stress when they’re no longer overworking to try and prove themselves. In fact it’s a workshop I presented to the Office of the Prime Minister a couple of years ago to staff (unfortunately the PM was out of the country).
I take people through strategies to offset Imposter Syndrome but I can also tell you why Jacinda Ardern refers in this clip to ‘it not being as pronounced for me this last year’
It’s something I refer to as the competence confidence loop. When we try something new for the first time and get out of our comfort zone, like a new job or challenge it’s where we can feel Imposter Syndrome the most. But as time goes on and we learn and grow in the role and overcome the challenge the feeling lessens. It’s normal to feel uncomfortable when we get out of our comfort zone, to worry about failing or not being as good as people think. But when we try and succeed we collect evidence of our competence and this in turn boosts our confidence. Now in the last year Jacinda Ardern has been re-elected as PM (a great vote of confidence I’d say) and being internationally acclaimed the world over appearing in Vogue, Time magazine and more. That’s pretty solid evidence of your competence and an evidence portfolio any Imposter would struggle to argue against. No wonder it’s not as pronounced for her this year!
Now we’re not all going to have Time and Vogue cover stories to boost our confidence, nor are we going to have the success of navigating a global pandemic to point to but the principles are the same. When we prove ourselves competent we grow in confidence but this only happens by facing the fear in the first place and getting uncomfortable.
When we get out of our comfort zone one of two things will happen. Either we’ll succeed (and enter that competence confidence loop) or we’ll fail – and learn something that helps us succeed next time around (with the same impact on our competence confidence loop). Too often we think that failure is a negative, that it’s proof our imposter syndrome is right but it’s often part of the competence confidence loop, the longer way around to the same destination. A harder path to travel but one that also helps us offset our Imposter Syndrome. Our PM also talks about mistakes she’s made and lessons she’s learned and it’s often this stuff that allows us to be as successful as we are thus completing the competence confidence loop as well as turning down the volume on our Imposter Syndrome.
I remember feeling like an Imposter, ironically when I was being called the Imposter Syndrome expert in the media. I’d written about it in my book but I’d not delivered too many workshops by then and was still researching more of the data and content so feeling like anything but an expert. I’d worry that interviewers were going to ask me questions I didn’t know the answer to or that I’d get ‘found out’. A year on and a few more workshops, conferences and interviews under my belt and I feel the benefit of the competence, confidence loop and the feeling of being ‘found out’ is replaced by one of confidence.
Find out more on my website and download your free guide to overcoming imposter syndrome.
